Forbidden Heat novel Chapter 194

Reiner is still fast asleep and I was working hard to resist my urge to reach out my hand to touch his wonderfully unique red hair. Seeing his face still and up close made me realize all the more how good looking he is. His eyelashes were auburn, slightly lighter and not as red compared to his hair, and long. His nose and lips were also beautifully shaped. They usually made him look so manly but right now they made him look quite adorably cute. He seems to be in a deep sleep so I guess he won’t wake up if…

I reached out my right hand slowly towards his head until finally I could feel his hair lightly rubbing against my fingertips. Wow! His hair is much softer than I imagined. This feel a little like stroking an orange little baby fox. Enjoying the sensation, I moved my hand closer to stroke his hair lightly. Looking at his face, I was relieved that he was still fast asleep. Playing and teasing him a bit like this was making me feel quite cheerful and I could feel a smile on my lips. I stared at his face for a while as I enjoyed the peace and quiet of the night.

He wouldn’t wake up if I touched his lips, right? I thought optimistically as I reached out my fingertips towards his beautiful lips. Please just let me touch them softly a little. I brushed my thumb ever so softly on his lower lip feeling its warm and soft touch on my fingertip along with the warmth from his breathing. He looks so precious in that moment, and I wanted to thank him for taking care of me so well.

“Ah!” I yelped in surprise when I felt something warm and wet on my thumb as Reiner took my thumb into his mouth and began sucking it lightly. Instinctively, I started to pull back my hand but he caught my wrist with his hand making it impossible for me to move. He continued sucking and licking my thumb as his now-opened blue eyes gazed back at me. His warm tongue on my skin is making my body shiver a little.

“Are you done playing with me?” he asked seductively after he released my thumb from his warm and wet lips.

“Sorry, I woke you…I mean, when did you wake up?” I asked in a shy voice. He hasn’t been awake all this time, right?

“Actually, I woke up when you woke up. When you first stirred in your sleep, it woke me. I’m a very light sleeper. I’m an ex-mercenary, so yeah…” Reiner explained as his eyes lit up teasingly.

“So, you were awake when I touched your hair?” I asked for confirmation.

“Yup. When you touched my hair, stared at my face, and stroke my lips, I was awake throughout all those things,” Reiner confirmed my worst ever suspicion. I felt blood rush to my face and knew that I must be blushing hard.

“Would you like to confess to me why you were playing with me in my sleep?” Reiner asked in a seemingly innocent voice. He must be playing with me again.

“I…thought you looked cute,” I replied, deciding to be honest.

“Me…cute? That’s the first time someone’s called me cute,” Reiner replied seeming quite confused at my words.

“I mean…you looked cute while you were sleeping. When you’re awake you’re very manly and not…cute, I guess?” I tried to explain. I wasn’t sure if this was helping.

“Are you feeling better?” Reiner asked as moved closer to me to place his hand softly on my forehead to check if I had a fever.

“I’m feeling better. I don’t think I have a fever either. Umm…thank you for taking such good care of me. Did you…umm…clean me and change my clothes?” I asked with shaky voice. I sort of already knew the answer though.

“…Yeah, I did,” Reiner replied with a tight smile.

“…So, you saw…” I mumbled softly.

“Sorry! I didn’t mean to see you naked,” Reiner apologized as he stood up from his seat and bowed to me.

“It’s ok. I didn’t mean that...Thank you. I wouldn’t have wanted the maids to see me that way…” I replied and my voice trailed off as my mind recalled how Lucien treated me so roughly.

I didn’t mind that Reiner saw my naked body at all. I just didn’t want him to see and touch my filthy and messed up body. If he cleaned me that he probably saw it all, the hickeys on my body that Lucien intentionally left and the traces of his seed on my inner thighs and legs. He’s probably disgusted with me deep inside and I couldn’t blame him. Afterall, right now, I feel pretty disgusted with myself too.

I felt tears sting my eyes and I wanted to be left alone now.

“I’m ok now. I’m going back to sleep. I think you should go back to your room,” I told Reiner as I turned by body away from him. I hope he would leave soon. I didn’t want him to see me cry.

“Alright. Goodnight, Natalia,” Reiner replied softly and left.

After I heard the door to my bedroom click close after Reiner left, I started crying my eyes out. I curled myself into a small ball and cried silently. I love Lucien so much so when he touches me roughly like that I feel so hurt. This is worst than any nightmare. Even if I told Lucien that I loved him, I doubt that he would believe me now. It also doesn’t change the fact that I’ve slept with Edward so many times that we might as well be regular lovers. On top of all that, it probably doesn’t matter how I feel, Lucien will be marrying Angela very soon.

I just want to get away from here. I hope his threats about keeping me locked up in this house is not true. I guess I can still go out if I take Reiner with me and that is probably my only source of comfort right now.

I’m still crying quite heavily. My body knows exactly what to do to fall asleep again. My body’s just going to cry until it shut down and went to sleep. I probably want to do just that as well. Welcome back, my habit of crying myself to sleep. Mum, I just want to leave this place. Maybe Lucien isn’t who you thought he was. Maybe…we’re not really family after all…

…

It’s so warm. My body was suddenly enveloped in something warm. I opened my eyes lazily to realize that Reiner was by my side and hugging me tightly. I slowly sat up and I could make out his face a bit better in the dark as his face came closer to mine.

“Why are you here?” I asked in a whisper. My voice sounds hoarse and it was clear that I had been crying quite a lot.

“Am I supposed to leave you to cry yourself to sleep?” Reiner replied as he hugged me against his chest. I could feel his warmth and the sound of his strong heart beating as I laid my face against this muscular chest. His hug was so comforting that I felt tears in my eyes once more. With everything going on in my harsh reality, the comfort of his arms feels like sanctuary.

“It’s ok to cry. I’ll be here for you,” Reiner comforted me as his hand stroked my hair tenderly.

“You don’t hate me? I don’t disgust you?” I blurted out my worries.

“Is that what’s been bothering you? You’re beautiful. I don’t hate you and you don’t disgust me…” Reiner said sweetly as he lifted my head from his chest.

Our eyes met and his face was so close to mine. I could feel his warm breath on my forehead and his face slowly came even closer. His arms were now around my waist and pulling me closer to him. I hooked my arm around his neck, slowly pulling him down lower as I offered my lips to him. His attractive blue eyes were the last thing that I saw before our lips slowly touched. His kiss is so warm and gentle. It was slow and comforting. He didn’t demand anything from me and we just enjoyed each other’s company. It was such a chaste kiss but it made me feel so wanted.

“Goodnight, Natalia,” Reiner spoke softly as got up to leave.

“Can’t you…stay?” I blurted out my genuine desire. I wanted to spend more time with him but I guess my words could be taken the wrong way and I looked down nervously.

“I’m afraid you won’t be getting much sleep if I stayed. Sleep well, Natalia,” Reiner teased me a little before heading out the door.

…

We are never going to do anything in that room. Natalia being so unsuspecting and innocent has not realized it, but to my trained eye, that peeping hole disguised in her wall is such an obvious trick. We will never know when someone is peeping in on us through that hole. Whoever installed the hole and is using it, must have a very twisted taste. If I cover the hole then the owner will know that he’s been discovered. I don’t have any other choice, I guess I’ll just have to find the right opportunity to warn Natalia about it…

--To be continued…