Life After the Storm novel Chapter 82

My wolf is pulling to her mate, she wants to see him. I am nervous I didn't let him to die afraid of what he may think. I hide him, so he wouldn't be found but was it enough. Damn it, it's not like I left him out in the open and put a sign on him to come get me. I feel so bad for what I did, but I had no other choice at the time.

Star is yelling inside my head, “please take me to my mate, he's alive, I want to be with him.”

I don't know what to do, I also felt the connection with Ivan but all the things that he has done to me. I don't know what I feel when I look at him, I know I felt fear before, but its seems different now. I don't feel any kind of genuine love for him but could I. Star is attempting to take over my body, but I am stronger, I don't allow her to.

Ivan is becoming closer, his scent is sending arousal through my body, I purr to the delight. Unsure what to make it out as. This is the man who has terrified me And put me through so much misery, but yet, My body craves him more than anything.

I watch as he removes his jacket exposing his neck showing the mark that I have given him. The crowd begins to rattle, surprised, not knowing Ivan is my mate. I become silent, uncertain what to say, how to explain it. He walks up so close that my nose is touching his, the heat between us is exhilarating.

I then hear a familiar voice, knowing it's Landon's mother, I hear her say. “Please welcome Ivan, the alpha of the wicked falls pack. Your New alpha's mate, welcome him.”

You hear the cheers and clapping from the crowd, then you hear someone yelling are we joining packs that will make us even more strong.

I watch as the color slowly drains from Ivan's face. We cannot join packs because the wicked falls pack is no longer. We got attacked, everybody was either killed or captured. I didn't find anybody who survived, not even my family.

After his words, I can see the fear running through my pack members. Realizing now what kind of danger they're really in. I know most would want to run and hide. But I'm scared that they won't ever stop hurting and killing innocent wolves. Can I really leave Jayden, what if he comes back here And I'm not here, what will happen to him then?

I feel like my mind is rambling in circles, unable to decide or to even think straight. What is a good idea and what is not, I'm so unsure. Now I want to stay because of Jayden, I know it is selfish on my part, especially if it means losing pack members. He's just a child, how do I just leave and not wait for him to come back. Terrified of the alternative, which is accepting that he may never come back.

I would like to hold on to as much faith as I possibly can, knowing if he had gotten lost that he would have been found by now. Accepting the fact that someone has taken him and the chances of finding him are not good. Without endangering the rest of the pack. I can't risk everybody's life. I wish I could just go alone, but my responsibility is now to them.

My arm begins to tingle looking to figure out why, that's when I notice that Ivan is pulling on to me. I want to shrug him off and tell him never to touch me again me, but I don't, instead I listen. “Stella, can we please talk, there is so much I need to say."?

I want to say no, I want to tell him to go straight to hell. But I think about my wolf, she has been so lonely without her mate. Maybe if I try, she will come back to me. To be at my strongest, I need her on my side. With her, it would make me unstoppable. Having my full-strength and then plus hers, I can't imagine what I would be able to do.

“Yes, we can go to my cabin to talk in private, follow me.”

I am surprised I don't feel any kind of fear, I'm not even nervous to talk to Ivan. He used to be the monster in my dreams. Something is different, and I don't know what, but I can feel it. The coldness I felt in his eyes is no longer there, they're warm. Could he really be a different man, or is it all made up to attempt to capture me?

He grabs my arm and says to Lilly, “We don't need to go into private, anything I have to say I can say In front of whomever.”

I want to tell him not to put his hands on me. But God is touch feels so good. I don't want him to know that it affects me at all, so I shrug it off. If he's not trying to get me alone, maybe he's not trying to capture me or hurt me. Perhaps he did change. I look at him confused and say, “OK well get on with it, what do you want to tell me?”

“I'm really confused on all that has happened to me. It was like I was in another dimension, then all of a sudden, I just came back. I felt terrible when I saw the fear in your eyes, how scared you were of me. Knowing I had to do something horrible to make you so scared. I'm so sorry, I want to know if you could ever give me a chance. The Ivan that you have meant is not the true Ivan.”

I need my wolf if I am going To become the alpha that I need to be to protect my pack. I need to give Ivan a chance if not for me but for star, my wolf. So at least I can say I did everything I could if it doesn't work out, I just hope she understands.

I just simply so “okay”