Love Aint Always Pretty novel Chapter 81

Pursuit

- the act of pursuing

Origin: Middle English

81

While I was busy grabbing all of my stuff to get myself some lunch, there was a sudden knock on my door.

"Hi." Nick greeted as he opens it wide.

I froze for about five seconds when our eyes met and then I recovered. I gaze at my watch and it was twelve five noon. I'm starving for some steak and he's making me starve if he stays longer inside my office. He walks inside while every employee behind him was looking right at us. He slowly closes the door behind him but I could still see heads peeping out.

"Hi." I cleared my throat.

He glanced at his gold wristwatch, "It's lunchtime. Wanna go grab something to eat together?" He asked.

I bite my lower lip. Together.

"Nick, your employees think something is going on between the two of us after what you did for me. It's better if we avoid each other." I say.

"Grab a pad and a pen, we'll make them think we're going for a lunch meeting."

I sigh. "Nick. Why are you doing this?"

I pulled up my hand to show him my wedding ring to show him that I'm married. "I'm married."

"You're married." I added.

He sighs.

"We can't be seen together and if your employees will tell your wife that they saw you entering my office and we went out for lunch together, I'll be fired." I continued.

"Did Dakota taunt you to stay away from me?" He asked.

Yes.

"She didn't. I just wanna make it clear to you that we can't do things that we used to do. For god's sake Nick, we're both married people." I answered.

I grabbed my purse.

"You're heading somewhere?" He asked.

"Lunch." I say firmly.

"Can't two good ol' friends have a peaceful lunch together?" He asked.

Jesus Christ Nick. Why are you making me lose my mind?!

"I'll meet you at Travioli. We can't be seen leaving together." I say.

He nods and smiles at me while he walks out of my office. I waited for a few minutes before I could leave and when I finally did stepped out of the building, I hailed a cab and went to Travioli. Damon didn't want me to drive my car because he doesn't want me to get into a car accident.

When I arrived at Travioli, I marched my way towards where Nick was sitting down. I sat right across him and noticed that he already ordered meals for us. Goodness, the steak looked delicious as hell. I don't know how he knows what I'm craving for today but at least he knows my favorite meals. It's been a very long time since we went out together like his, just the two of us.

"Eat up." He says.

I smiled.

We ate silently and the dishes he ordered were insanely good. The gravy was salivating on my tongue and the vegetable salad was to die for. I've noticed something about Nick, and he still doesn't talk or make eye contact when he eats. He's still the same old Nick I knew back in the day.

"You still don't talk." I blurted.

He slowly pulled his head up to me and wiped his cheek win the table napkin. "What does that mean?" He asked.

"You don't talk or make eye contact when you eat. I've noticed that since before." I say.

I glanced at him, "You still do it now."

He smiles. "You know me too well."

I smiled ruefully.

He continued eating while I just watch him and whatever he was doing was adorable to me. I know this was the right time to tell him that he's probably the father to this child inside of me but something holds me back now that I've started a life with Damon. I bent my head down right away when he pulled his head up to me. All of sudden, Nick holds my hand. I looked back at him.

"It's really too late to chase you now, huh?" He asked.

He grips my hand briefly but then he didn't release me when I attempted to pull back my hand.

"Our lives have changed Nick." I say. "I mean look at you, you look different yourself."

"I do look different now, physically but you're still the one who owns me."

Before, I would cry at night cos of the pain when I think about Catherine owning his heart and his love. But now that he loves me and that I hold a huge piece of his heart, it's already too late for the both of us to start something beautiful.

"You're married. You're about to become a father to Dakota's baby. Stop saying things like this." I tell him.

You're the father to my baby too.

He sighs. "The wedding is all for show. You know that."

"You need to accept the baby Nick even when it's not yours."

"I know. Sometimes Dakota is too much and she's choking me."

I sigh heavily.

"Savannah?" Someone with a familiar voice called out my name.

I froze when I saw Damon walking towards our table. My heart beats faster than a nanosecond when I saw my husband's reaction when he caught me having lunch and holding hands with some other man. Damon stares at Nick and I remember at the wedding, they never personally met since Nick didn't go to the wedding reception cos he left after the ceremony.

I quickly pulled my hand away from Nick when Damon stared at our hands entwined. Damon eyes me and his brows creasing. "What's going on here?" He asked.

"Damon." I stand and moved closer to my husband. "This is Mr. Nick Wilde. My boss."

There was an awkward silence between the three of us and I hope it's not doom's day today.

Nick stands, "It's nice to finally meet you." He says while extending a hand.

Damon accepts it. "Pleasure's mine. I'm Damon Patricks. Savannah's husband."

"Yeah. Heard a lot of stuff about you Mr. Patricks." Nick says.

"What were you doing here hon?" I asked Damon.

He moved his head to me, "Dropped by your office and I heard you went out for lunch. I knew I'd find you here." He smiles.

I smiled back. "Wanna join us for lunch honey? We were having some meeting for... The convention...in a week." I say.

"That would be good." Damon says while the three of us sat down.

Damon didn't bother about what he saw anymore. He didn't asked about it and definitely didn't make a scene. I don't know if he's only hiding the fact that he's sensing something between me and Nick the second he saw our hands entwined.

We talked about work related stuff and Nick asked Damon about how his company runs and they were both planning on becoming business partners together. Think about it, my husband and the man that I still love will have merging of business. Damon was cool. He's always the laid back type of person. He's just chill. I don't know what runs on his head sometimes but he's just so laid back about everything.

•••••

Three months passed, and my tummy was already getting bigger. I always love staring myself in front of the mirror every morning and before I sleep, and seeing some of my body parts changing, from my flabby arms, my belly growing, my thighs expanding bigger as I sit down, my calves are getting big too and my face is getting rounder along with my cheeks.

Every morning I would sing to my baby every time I bathe myself, mostly it's some old classical songs and I listen to some Beethoven classical songs or some piano pieces on my way to work. I have been wearing flowy and silky tops and dresses as well to hide my stomach growing.

It's been a month since the last time I saw Nick at work. A month since we had lunch together. I heard he's at France at the moment for some work related activities. I'm proud of Nick and how far he has come with his work. He achieved a lot of things and he did so many things. Even though it was an easy money since he married Mrs. Devaloines' one and only daughter, but he still makes me proud for expanding such huge company.

Sometimes, when I'm inside my office, I wonder if Nick knows I'm already three months pregnant since I always were baggy tops. Sometimes I wonder if I still cross his mind. Sometimes I wonder if he misses me when he doesn't see me. Sometimes I wonder if ever he sleeps with Dakota does he still see me. Sometimes I wonder if he misses my kisses and misses making love to me like how much I miss it.

"What?" I asked in disbelief.

Damon drops his fork and wipes his cheek with the table napkin.

"Damon I can't do that." I say.

He sighs. "Yes you can."

"I can't."

"Why? Why can't you do that for me?"

"I love this job and you know that. I can't just resign because you tell me so. I have a contract with Devaloines Publishing House."

"Well, I'll pay it. Just quit your job."

I sigh inwardly. It's not that I don't want to quit my job because I don't want to be away from Nick, but because of the great salary, Im also learning a lot of things that I need to know.

"Damon..." I sigh. "I don't want to resign."

"File a resignation letter, we're moving to England. You don't need to work anymore, I have the money to support you."

"I want to work for myself too. I don't want to be just a household wife. I wanna work."

"Savannah, we talked about our move to England weeks ago. My company is expanding there and I'm going to manage it. I need to take you there with me."

I exhaled. I don't wanna go. I don't wanna leave this place. I don't wanna be away from Nick.

"Give me more time. I'll think about it." I tell him.

After having lunch with Damon, I stuck myself inside my office with a coffee on my hand. I haven't slept well last night because I was chasing for the deadline. I read a lot of articles that's needed to be edited and as I do it, I can't help but think about Damon's offer. Us moving to England. I really don't wanna go. I don't wanna quit my job. I don't wanna be stuck inside the Josie for the res of my life and wait for my husband to come home whenever he wants. I don't want that life.

A week passed, and I have finally made a decision for myself. I was busy finishing my final edits for this article since my shift was almost about to end. I kept rereading it over and over again to look for some mistakes, in case I missed a few. When I was done, I quickly stood up and grabbed my bag and my resignation letter. Damon has been forcing me to go with him and he said he already bought a mansion there for us to live.

I stretched my arms out and grunted when suddenly I felt my eyesight getting blurry. I felt my world spinning slow so I reached for my chair to hold onto something for my balance.

"I hate when I'm reading too much.." I massaged my temples.

The door swings open and I pulled my head up junky to find Nick standing by the doorway with a red paper bag on his hand and a box colored white and blue. He walks inside my office causally and I just stared at him, not expecting him to be here. I thought he was still at France.

"Nick." I say in disbelief.

"Hello you. Good thing I was still able to catch you around here." He told me.

"I... Thought you were in France?"

"Just landed. Came here as soon as I can." He starts walking to me and handed me what he was holding.

"For you." He hands the red paper bag to me.

"What is this?" I asked.

"Saw that dress in a boutique at France and I thought of you."

"Nick. You didn't have to do this. What will Dakota say?"

He smiles. "She's in Hongkong. Don't worry. And I really wanted to give you a present for no reason. Well then think of it as a late wedding gift."

I paused and accepted the paper bag on my hand. "Thanks."

"And this box is..." He trailed off.

"For your baby." He adds.

My eyes widened. "How'd you... How did you know?"

"If Mrs. Hall didn't tell me that you were having a baby and your bump is growing bigger, I wouldn't know."

I bent my head down low.

"You still look beautiful." He says with his contrasting winter blue eyes looking at me. I smile at him.

How can I un-love you Nick? I think u can never do that.

"I'm happy for you and Damon." He adds with ruefulness on his voice.

He clears his throat. "You'll be starting a family soon. That's really a great news for you."

I look at him and he smiles at me fakely. I didn't want to hurt him about this and I'm still not sure if this baby is Damon's because the last person I had sex with three months ago was with Nick and it would be too impossible that Damon would be the father to this child inside me.

"Thanks Nick." That's all I could say to him.

"What's that in your hand?" He noticed.

I gazed at the long white envelope and finally handed it to him since Dakota was at Hongkong. It would be appropriate to give it to him now since he's already here.

"Resignation letter." I say.

His face falls. "You're resigning?"

I nod.

"Savannah you have a contract here with us. You can't just resign." Nick tells me.

"Damon is going to pay it with whatever amount that is. He's willing to."

"Why are you resigning?"

I took a deep breath in and exhaled heavily. "Me and Damon are moving to England."

His face shows dismay and pain. His brows creasing at the center of his forehead and he stares at the box on his hand. He slowly pulled his head up and looked at me.

"I hope you could tell Dakota about this matter, Nick." I said.

"Can you still think about it? We need you. You're good at this and we'd loose someone capable enough who's very excellent at this field and that's you Savannah."

I sigh. "I've made up my mind Nick. Thank you very much for accepting me here. It was a marvelous experience to explore."

He slowly and silently handed me the box. Suddenly my phone rings and I knew it was already Cameron. He's the one picking me up today since we're having family dinner tonight.

"I'll be going now." I say.

"When are you leaving the company?" He asked seriously.

"The day after tomorrow. Damon had already fixed our papers and that was the only thing I waited for before I file a resignation letter."

Suddenly he hugged me tight with his arms wrapped around me. "It hurts me so much that everything is changing between us and I can't do anything about it anymore." he says to me.

I feel like my tears are building up but I try to hold it in.

"It hurts me seeing you that you're already starting your own family now while I'm still stuck on the thought about you becoming the mother to my children." He adds.

You are the father to my child Nick, though vaguely.

He pulled himself away and cupped both of my cheeks as he kisses my forehead. "I will love you Savannah..."

"Until forever runs out." He adds.

________

SFTC:

Wasted Time - Vance Joy