My Fiancée Hates Me novel Chapter 73

"I saw some markers running along the walk with a picture of a calla lily flower and thought it might lead to a garden," I said.

He grabbed my wrist in the midst of the garden.

A gust of wind flew through an open door. We were both suddenly trapped in a small tornado of white petals.

"You have been to this here before and know things about me that only I would know...Do you know something? Why won't you answer any of my questions?"

If I tell you everything, would the future change?

No, you would be my Hero again...Then, once again, you will die because of me.

"I do not have to tell you everything," I said as I slapped his hand away. "You are troubling me by acting like this...So what if I know a few things about you? I was raised to be your Queen without knowing full well what all of my lessons were for. I thought that I was learning for the sake of being a proper daughter of my family. My use as a woman lies with how well I match with my future partner. It is normal for my parents to think about giving me information about the most prospective bachelor with the second to highest position in the kingdom."

"How would you know of the secret passageways?" Prince Erik asked.

"My parents are both close to His Majesty...I heard stories about the passageways from them and have frequented the Royal Castle various times," I said coldly.

Lying to his face is becoming increasingly difficult...Is this because this is the longest time that we had spent together? Was it because I could not tell him about how we were once married?

I failed at making him hate me...

I failed at not making him not have feelings for me...

The only one thing I want to not fail at is saving him in this life. I do not want to face the despair of losing this person again. All I ask is that you of all people do not pry into my heart.

"...Aren't those all lies?" he asked as he increased his grip on my wrist.

I felt as if my emotions were going to consume me and that I was going to accidentally say the truth.

I need to get out of here!

"...Why? Why do you keep pestering me with all of these questions?" I asked.

"When you lie, you claw yourself in the palm of your hand just like what you are doing right now..."

That line...

How would he know such things?

I looked down at my wrist he was holding onto. My nails had dug in so far that I was bleeding. I pulled my hand back and held it towards my chest.

"...Did you ever just think that I hate being touched by you this much?" I asked as I gritted my teeth.

I ran away from him. No longer did it matter where I ran. As long as I was far from him, that was all that mattered...

That way, I could save what was left of my fragmented heart.

I went to the throne room and tried to collect myself once again.

Within a few minutes, someone else entered the room.

"I saw you run in here, Arielle," Kaya Ouchi said. "If you could be a doll, just tell me where Prince Erik is...We are on a tight schedule to make an heir."

This person has no qualms about being prudish...

Here, in this exact spot...I lost my life here.

"...I will not be your doll or anything. I will not do as you ask either," I said frigidly.

"...You are not the only one who does not do as I ask. Neither Gavin Lord, Randall Maddox, Channing Wells, nor Dolton Grass would do as I ask...Once I convict you of the recent kidnapping of the female Nobles, Prince Erik and every person that once loved you will all look down on you as well."

What she was saying was cruel, yet her tone sounded melancholic for some reason.

"...Why would you do all this?" I inquired her.

"...Is it not obvious that I want to be Queen? You ruined my chances with Prince Erik," she said as she glared at me.

Her condescending tone was gone despite her words.

"If that was all, would it not just be easier to go after His Majesty instead? You do not just want to be Queen...You also love Prince Erik."

This person is in love with Prince Erik.

This person was crying when she hurt Erik in our first lives. If she only cared about the throne, she would not have cried like that.

I hate this person, but I can somehow understand her the most because we fell for the same person. In the end, we both ended up not being able to convey our feelings to the person we cared about the most.

"In the beginning, I thought it would be nice to change my life when I came to this world. The best way for me to assure my happiness would be with that person. A life of luxury with a beautiful man...That surely is happiness, right? I never thought that I would end up falling for his smile. Everyone says that you should never fall for royalty because the one who falls in love will be the person who gets hurt the most," she said as she held her face in her hands. "They were right...I became unable to convey my feelings the more I grew to love him because I knew that he was in love with someone as perfect as you. He never looked at anyone else but you. Could you imagine the dread I felt from not being able to convey my feelings to him?"

She looked up at me with her tear-stricken face.

"I understand how it feels to love someone and not be able to convey your feelings to them. I am the same way once...I still have not come to terms yet with my own feelings and continue hurting the people closest to me."

I have not been able to answer to Garett's feelings properly yet. This is all because I have been dragging old feelings around...I am not sure of who I am truly in love with. However, I can tell that my heart clearly wants to be with Garett. I am just not able to put my feelings into words yet.

"How could you understand my pain? You were born with a good family, wealth, beauty, intelligence, and people constantly fawning over you. It is unfair for such a perfect being to exist! I was a middle-aged woman with an average wage job without anyone to love or anyone to love me. I thought that being reborn in this life would give me a chance at happiness. All I received was a low Noble title and scrutiny from other Nobles because I was not like them. For you, who is loved by this world and everyone in it...you could not even spare me the one person I fell in love with at the very least."

If someone who truly loved Prince Erik came by, would I be able to simply nod my head and accept that person even if that person was the person who hurt Erik in our first lives?

The reason Erik even died in the first place was because of me...In the beginning, all of her hate was directed towards me. If I leave to never appear in front of her, she will not have a reason to be hateful anymore.

"I do not mind you being with Prince Erik as long as you truly love him. However, you have to make do with your own effort to make him love you. I cannot give you that because my effort is of my own and his heart belongs to only him. Whether he falls for you or not will be because of your efforts and yours alone..."

"...Do I not get a choice?" Prince Erik asked.

Why was he here?

Is history going to repeat?