Shouldn't Have Kissed You novel Chapter 42

Chris walked downstairs hurt more than he thought was possible. He thought what Kimberly did to him was worse but Maya accusing words hurt him more than he thought he was hurt by his ex lover.

Yes, she was his ex lover. After what she did to him he wanted nothing to do to her. He even fired her but it was Kimberly he was dealing with. She would do anything not to be jobless.

Chris walked to the kitchen and made himself coffee. Where would he go with briefs anyway? It hurt him but he wasn't ready to leave Maya. At least not anytime soon. Or maybe unless she leaves him herself.

She said that she loved him. Maya Freeman loved a man like him. An animal who once saw pleasure in her pain. The beast who pushed her for sitting on his bed which now made nothing without her sleeping besides.

That was what hurt even more. That a woman like Maya would love a beast like him. This wasn't the fairly tale of the beauty and the beast but a reality thing.

It was his reality. Their reality but still she fall in love. She fall in love with him despite his misbehavior. She still did. Chris poured himself a cup of coffee and sat on the highland stood. Damn, he needed to think before he made any decision what so ever.

He placed the cup on his lips but he regretted the moment he did that. The damn this tasted bitter. If there was something that he had come to terms with was coffee. He had accepted that he would never make the same way Maya does dispute her showing him how to make it for more than he can count.

Chris pushed the mug away and walked to the music room. Maybe playing piano would make him make a better decision. A decision that won't hurt her or him at that matter. But walking in there only had him wishing that he hadn't.

How could he play the damn thing when he saw was Maya and him settled on that piano playing together. But it was a warm feeling which in a way had wiped away his hurt. He walked to the piano and sat down.

Chris began to play piano by Nick Minaj and as he played he couldn't help but think of the lyrics. Maybe he was playing Maya. He had played her for so long and she had let him play on. She allowed him to be a beast to her when she could have stopped him. When she could have said enough to him but instead she didn't.

She allowed him to play her. To play her like some piece of garbage. That's why she didn't think twice when she accused him few minutes ago. Because she didn't trust him and she was right not to trust him. She really was because he never gave her reason to trust him since they met...

Chris was jacked up when he had the music play in a different way and if he must add, perfect way. He knew he was off key but not that bad. He turned to his right and there she was, sited next to him.

Chris said nothing and neither did she as they continued to play along the piano. Her thoughts seemed to be far and he knew what she was thinking. She was think what he was thinking before she intruded.

Once the song was over, they all stared at space and let their unspoken words room around the room. It was funny but in a way it was peaceful. Peace that they both had no idea how long it will take before it left them.

"You were off key."

Yeah, that was what she said to him without looking at him. And him, he didn't know what to tell her at all.

"It has become an issue with me, I can't seem to play piano alone anymore."

How else were they supposed to act? She didn't glance at him still and he didn't mind. In fact deep down he was thankful for that.

"It's not only piano." She said looking at something ahead of her. "Even the coffee is worse."

That had Chris laughed which earned him a glance and in a way, it felt like everything was okay. Like they're both warming up to each other.

"I know, right?" He turned himself to fully glance at her. "It seems like I need you in my life Maya."

Of course he did. He needed her in his life more than he needed his damn brain to think. He had admitted that to himself a long time ago but the past wasn't letting him be happy. In fact it made sure to catch up with him every damn moment he seemed to gain happiness.

But how long was he going to allow that? To allow his past determine his present and his future? Until when was he going to pay for the past mistakes? He had done that way too many times and now, now he had to be selfish.

He had to think about himself. Think about his plans for the present and the future and dual on the past. It was the time. If not then then when? When he releases that he has nothing to be proud of in terms of person life.

He wasn't going to let that happen. Maya was his present and his future. His one true love. His heart beat for her and only her. Then where allow his ugly past determine his happiness? Why loose one thing that would forever make him happy because of his retreats and her lack of trust when he could give her reason for her to trust him.

It was better to try than to not try at all. Right?

"And you've me Chris. I'm not going anywhere unless you lemme go."

And those were the only thing that he wanted to hear. Maya was his to love and spend life time with and for that that only he had to appreciate. Yes, he felt like jumping up and down but that was for later. Now, they needed a serious talk before they all entered into there forever love.

"Maya, I'm sorry that I wasn't your ideal husband. I wasn't the man that you dreamed of having an your husband but as nature has it or destiny or fate whatever is out there we met and got married.

"I did hate you from the second time that met and I took my argue on you. I blamed you for everything when I was partly part of it. I was the one who kissed you yet I acted like you're the one. I know I've said this more than ten times but I'll forever say it. I'm truly sorry for everything I did in the past Maya.

"I don't one to loose you now cause I know nothing without you. I'll die without you and I'd do it slowly which is painful. Like I told you, I love you Maya. I love you more than I ever wanted to love you.

"I don't know how it happened or when it did so please don't ask me. But in a way you grew under my skin and I can't seem to wash you of me. I need you Maya. I need you more than I care to admit to Wesley when he tells me I'm already whipped. Hell I am.

"I get jealous when I see you laugh louder with anyone that is not me. I do Maya. Most especially when you hold hands in public with Leonel and seen relax but when do that you get tensed.

"I want my present and future with you. I need you in my life Maya Freeman. I want you love me and only me. I want us to tell our kids our story together. I want to be their biological father and you mother, Maya. I love you that much. I want to get old with you and if there is reincarnation, then I want my next life with you.

"I want you in heaven with me as we sing glorious God. Please, let's grow both physically, spiritually and emotionally together. Give me a chance to prove to you that I can be an angel from being a devil."

Okay, where that speech came from, he had no idea but he was glad that it did. He expressed his feelings toward her and all he hoped for was for her to listen to him and give him a chance. She was his necessity and he wouldn't do anything without her by his side.

Chris was sure that Maya was his better half. His lost rib and her fresh of his fresh.

"Chris." She called taking his hand. "I should be the one apologies to you for everything. It's fault as much as its you and I won't make any speech to you of any sort.

"I love you Chris Rollins and just like you I don't know when my crush turned to love but it did despite everything that went down between us. I know when people will learn what went on between the two of us they will call me name. And I don't blame them.

"In fact I deserve there hate and everything but we don't tell our heart who to love and not to. And for that, I'm ready to be called a fool for your sake. Please just lemme show you that I truly trust you Chris. I'm sorry about earlier. Truly sorry."

Chris pulled his had away from her shaking ones and placed them on her cheeks. He wiped away her tears and smiled at her. It was a new beginning. For them and there love for each other. All he prayed for was that they love each other forever.

Chris pulled Maya into a hug and they stayed like that for what seemed like forever. He had his love by his side and he sure as hell going to cherish every moment together. They exchanged I love you and stayed quiet after pulling away from each other.

Maya leaned on Chris' shoulder and he stroke her hair. He didn't know how long they stayed like that but when he felt her even breathing, he knew she had fallen asleep once again.

Chris carried Maya in bridal style and took them to there room. Yes, it was there and not his. That thought had him remembering something. Once he laid her on their bed, he pulled the duvet over her body since somewhere when they're talking it began to rain.

Chris walked to Maya's luggage and pulled them to a walk in closet. He opened her big suitcase and began to unpack her clothes. He placed her tops on the shelves and hugged her dresses, the ones that needed to.

He didn't know that she had that much of clothes since it took him an hour to place everything where it deserved to be placed. Now his closet looked more homey than before. Certified with what he did, Chris pulled some sweats and brief and walked to the adjust bathroom.

Once done taking a shower, Chris walked down stairs and began to make late lunch for the both of them. He was mid way when he had too soft arms rest against his bare stomach. How he would want to live like that forever. With Maya wrapped around him.

"The Sleeping Beauty is awake." He said while staring the pasta in the pot.

"You could have laid beside me, you know." Chris felt her lips on his back and he almost burned himself. "Relax hubby."

Wow! Now she was taking pleasure in seeing him that way. Chris felt her lips near his earlobe kissing him and a shiver run down his spine.

"You're still tensed, puppy."She whispered to him and that was his last straw.

In one movement, Chris had Maya pinned against the highland and his lips on hers. She was sweet more than last night if that was even possible. They're both fighting for dominance and it seemed like he was loosing to her and he let her. He freaking let a woman win over him for once in his life.

He felt her hands lower to his torso and he gasped only to have her slide her tongue to his. Well she knew which buttons to push and when to push them and that had him smiling in between there passionate kiss.

Chris felt Maya's had move back up and he had come to terms that she had done that just to have an access to his mouth. Her hands went to his hair and she let her figures run freely through it.

For the same of breathing Maya pulled away from him but Chris didn't her her take a moment to breath. He pulled her up and placed her on the counter and stepped in between her legs. He began to kiss her jaws going down to her neck allowing his hand to her thigh. She moaned louder when he sucked below her earlobe.

His had was going upper as it massaged her inner thigh when she moaned out his name. He didn't pay attention to her and when he was about to take his hand to her...

"Chris, the pasta is burning."

Chris pulled away from her and turned to the stove. True to her words his pasta was burning. He switched off the stove and walked to take a dish where he put the top pasta leaving the burned one.

"You're such a bad cook." He heard her say from behind him. "Can you even handle me if you can't handle simple pasta?" She asked kissing he bare back again.

How she still had the strength to get of the counter he had no idea. And for once, Chris regretted not wearing anything since she was taking that as her advantage.

"Ooh trust me kitten, I can handle you much better than this damn..." He took in a deep breath when she placed her hands at his lower abdomen.

"You're saying?" She asked innocently remove her hands away from him.

It took him all he had not to turn around and show her who was really in charge. Or was she really the one in charge here? All this while Maya kept on kissing his back and all that he could do was hold the end of the counter as if his life depended on it.

But it does depend on it.

Maya stopped miss behaving with him only to stand on her toes so that she can whisper on his ear.

"I'm really bothered and I need a shower to calm myself down. See you later, puppy."

And just like that she walked away. Hell, he was the one in need of shower and a really cold one for that matter. Five minutes had passed but he still stayed in the same position trying to calm himself down.

Once he was calm enough, he went on making their lunch. Half an hour later, Chris was done and he set a table in the dinning area. Just then, Maya walked in still wearing his shirt but the one she wore this time was the one he had worn before he changed for party and mind you, it was dirty. In fact he had left it in the room that he had gone to change in. How she got it, he had no idea.

Maya sat innocently on her seat and served herself food. This time she did nothing and they ate silently. Once down, Maya got on her feet and cleaned the table. Chris took that chance to go and look for tee shirt. When he went down stairs dressed in a white T-shirt, he found Maya seated on the couch.

"What do we for the remaining hours?" He asked sitting next to her.

Maya laid on his laps and placed her legs on the couch. That move had Chris where he was sure she wanted him. His shirt barely hide nothing from him. He just had to straighten his eyes from looking at her legs.

"We could just get to know each other more." She said making circle on his lap. "Or what's in your mind."

Chris fought the pleasure that was building up in him and just nodded at her avoid to groan. She was doing everything with a purpose and she was winning if not the least. She sure was the one in charge and not him. And that had him wondering if he will ever be around her?

And they did. They talked for hours just like they're doing the previous days. They even got to talk about the movies.

"Hey," Chris said once Maya was done laughing over a joke he made about a movie that he couldn't even remember it's name. "How about we go on an honeymoon? You know, a real one."

He had to add the last part since once upon a time they did go for honeymoon but a fake one. Maya got to her sitting position and looked at him.

"Let's go to Kenya." She said excited.

Chris smiled at her. "Just like my mother had suggested before."

Maya smiled, "This time it's different now. I've always wanted to see world beast migrate from Kenya to Tanzania and this is the season for that."

"It's done." He said moving a bit. "All you've to do right now is to clear your schedule for two weeks."

"Two weeks?"

"Is that too short?"

"It's too long, Chris."

"Kitten, it's not long, in fact it's too short." Chris leaned in and pecked her lips. "And since it's too short, let's start it right now." He lifted her off of the couch and carried her to the bedroom.

All Maya did was just smile at him and lay her head on his chest. At this time, she only thought of herself in Maasai Mara watching the migration and the sun set...