You Saved Me Once Book 1 novel Chapter 44

It was night again, when I wake up. Ever since Hayes left, the first thing I do when wake up, is go to my window. His car is always there though, in the exact same spot. It’s in the same spot now.

Seeing it, affects my day. Thankfully the day, was coming to an end.

I roam the house, and watch T.V downstairs. Emma and Jake are in his room.

I kept my phone close, for Jeff. I waited for a text, or call, but nothing.

I was obsessed with the mystery of Jeff. I wanted to know him more, to feel him more.

For the first time ever, I want to share my secrets. I want Jeff, to know my secrets, while he kisses me. I want to comb through his hair and watch him get better. Watch the green line grow shorter, and shorter every time our lips meet. I want to get better, with him.

My phone buzzes under my leg. I put down my bowl of ice cream, to answer it.

“Hello?” There’s static for a while. I’m on mute.

“Alex?” It’s Adam. I can hear music in the background.

He walks someplace else, and the music quiets. I eat a spoonful of ice cream.

“How are things?” He asks me. He sounds buzzed.

“They are good. What are you doing?” I ask. I scrunch my hair.

Adam rarely calls, but he calls more than you’d think. More than Jack.

We’ve all been through a lot, so when a sibling calls, we always an-swer. No matter what.

Adam sounds sad. I can hear him sigh through the phone.

“How’s Jake, where is he?” He asks.

I pick at my splinter, because I’m about to lie.

“He’s good. I think he went out.” I say.

I didn’t want to get stuck on Jake for too long. I had another secret about him, it was fresh. Talking about him, made me feel guilty.

“What are you doing?” I ask.

I hear him sigh through the phone again, this makes me nerv-ous.

“I’m worried about you Alex.” He says. He’s being weird. I laugh to cover my fear.

I bite down on my lips, when my eyes start to water.

“Adam, I’m fine. I promise.” I lie.

“What did you eat today?” He asks.

“I’m eating now.” I say.

“What did you eat today, Alex?” He asks me.

“I just had a salad.” I lie.

There’s silence through the phone again, I can’t breathe.

“Come on, you don’t believe me.” I laugh, because I’m scared.

I don’t like to talk about my habit. I don’t like when people start to notice my habit.

There’s static again, it’s calming. Adam is still muted. I bite down on my spoon, when I go for another scoop.

“Alex.” He’s whispers.

“Do you miss her too?” He asks.

“Every day, Adam.” I say.

There’s silence. He mutes me again.

“Adam, what’s wrong?” I ask.

He clears his throat again.

“I just feel like shit right now.” He laughs. I smile.

“Are you at a party?” I ask.

I can hear Adam cover his mouth.

“No. I haven’t been drinking either.” I hear him laugh through the tears.

I ache

“Alex, I don’t want to be here.” He says.

The music is loud again. The static was louder. Chills coat my skin.

“Adam, don’t talk like that.” I say to him.

“Can you pick me up? I don’t want to be here. I just want to see you guys.” He cries.

Each time he gasps for air, chills coat me. I can feel his cold tears, through the static. I cover my mouth to hide my heavy breaths. To cov-er my, cry.

“Sure Adam, I’ll leave right now.” I say.

I stand up, to get more air.

“These fucking frat boys are fucking dicks, Alex.” He laughs, then cries.

The static takes over the phone, again. It’s static for a while, be-fore the call ends.

I put on my jacket, and text Rochelle for the first time in a while.

Want to go to a college party?

-Alex

F*ck Yes!

-Rochelle

~~~~~

The floor is glossy, the walls are blue. Everything smells of anti-septic and rubbing alcohol. It’s familiar.

My stomach is turning. I feel sick again.

I take deep breaths as I hold Jake’s hands, and Ms. Kristen’s holding mine. Adam is behind us.

We only had a few more steps, but I can’t take another step. I let go of their hands.

I’m standing there, and everyone’s staring at me. The pit was coming back.

Adam holds my hand, when he sees tears.

“It’s okay, Alex.” He says.

“I’m scared, Adam.” I mumble.

“Of what?” He laughs.

“Will she like me?” I ask. He smiles.

“Let’s find out.” He says.

I hold my breath. I only step, in the squares on the tile floor. This calms me, the tiles make me feel better.