If only he loved me too

Chapter 11: eleven

Shh...listen, don't you hear?

I'm crying, but they are silent tears.

I'm crying on the inside so you can't see

all the pain running through me.

I cry for you, I cry for me.

I cry for the times I can't,

so if you listen, you may hear my silent tears.

-Amanda smith

The sky weeps for me and so does the grass, the world filled with joy is weeping in tears. I wish I could not feel this... this sadness, this fear. 

People in the black walk up to me with sad faces or white roses, some hug me and some just smile sadly, all I could was lean on my wheelchair and hold my broken pieces together. it's hard, faking to be ok, is hard.

"Oh, my baby," Adeline wrapped her arms around and cried, she embraced in her warm body and wept for her grandson, her only grandson who was the last connection she had to her son. I can't relate to the pain she is feeling and here she was trying to console me, a brave soul she is. silent tears slip out of my tired eyes and I held her tighter because she needed it more than I do. 

already a wreck," Robert told his wife and gently pulled her away from me, he kissed me on

in the ground waiting to be let down, I placed my hand on top and laid my head on it "I didn't answer your question" I whispered into the wooden cascade "I never said I loved you because I do, I love you so, damn much. so much that it hurts, and I never got a chance to say it," I cried wetting a patch. "I promise to find out what happened that

what he is saying but couldn't seem to concentrate, I watch him being lowered into the ground where he will rest for

of soil and was asked to pour on top of the

Love you, Dimtri, I always have and always will." I throw a

so fast, and it was time for the service. I met some more people before excusing myself to go rest, John helped me up

huge window. this room is on the third floor so the view was breathtaking, I

he said in a warm, heavy voice he walked to stand beside me looking through the window as

because he paused

though his room was this high above" he chuckled "no matter how many guards I assign to stop him but it was all in the vain, he would somehow always trick them, so one day I followed him, " I looked at him raising an eyebrow

playing with my fingers nervously,

of the night to see his parents," he said and stopped

knew,

to his parent's grave, and now he laid beside

said he smiled

he left while patting on my

silently for maybe an hour and the moved towards the bed, the room was cleaned so I can rest here and I was grateful but sad because now I don't smell him here, to distract myself from going

from his teenage years and up, but not a single picture of his younger self. I pulled out a smiling picture of him he might be 20 or something, I pulled it

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