If only he loved me too

The very next morning I had written a long and very resourceful resignation letter and I had emailed it to the source of my unhappiness, the bane to my existence, and also the love of my life, the CEO of the M&T chain of companies.

I had ignored all of his urgent calls and texts, his voicemails begged to differ that he might be happy to know I dropped his ass flat on the pavement as he does over and over again, so, this is what he feels like when he leaves me to dry, it Doesn't matter to me if he is happy or not, I won't let him play with my life like some boardgame ever again. The words his grandmother spoke to me shed some light on the matter that he is using me on his terms, he wasn't there when I wanted him, and not it's my turn, I know it makes me sound petty but this is how I feel today so I'm gonna enjoy today and keep this regret and enlightenment for tomorrow.

I inhale a deeply encouraging and brave breath to get out of the car and walk towards the M&T building my spirit killer.

I smile at everyone on my way towards my ex-office and for the last time slide in my access card. On entering the room was just the way I left it, quickly I gather up my stuff and put it in a single box, I know it's a coward way out but I'm not ashamed of it. If I don't do it now, I know I can never have the courage to do it again.

I look at the room one more time and drop the key card on the table and leave, this time for good. I walk to the elevator and press to go down to the parking lot, the door was about to be closed when a hand stopped it and much to my dismay it was just the PA, I smile forcefully and stood there till we hit the ground, I leave the building and surprisingly, I didn't come around any kind of drama, no yelling, no breaking of things, no pushing on the wall and kissing nothing. it was like he was finally letting me go. I get into my car and just stay there thinking, imagining, something he could do to stop me, but he did none of that, it is as if I didn't matter to him like I thought I would. Funny enough I'm not angry, disappointed, definitely but not angry

It's like deep down I knew he didn't love me the way I did, we'll he can screw himself for all I care because I'm done. I'm done with his ass and this time it stays like that, well at least for a while or so. I hope

smaller as I drove away, it's like a huge weight had lifted off of me

is what they call freedom? It

leaving the city just, yet. but I'll think of something, I have

I ended up going to the sexiest club in the city and got shit-faced drunk with only Nicole. Both of us didn't need other people to celebrate my walk away from the most toxic relationship

drunk as hell herself too "your

as hard "no, your shit faced" we both doubled over laughing we look over the bartender "Mr. Bartender, two more shots, please"

left me twice" I show her my two fingers "twice, and I went out to find him, and that motherfucker didn't even stop me or call me or break down my front door and beg me to come back

a bad idea, " she tries to reach for my

a very good idea, I should call him and trash talk to him and get all that frustration out " I hit the call option and wait for him to

and seductive I think the drunk version of me is feeling it affects twice the hard than it normally