Love Aint Always Pretty

Lítost

- regret and remorse and repentance; a state of agony and torment; or sorrow said to be "created by the sudden sight of one's own misery"

Origin: Czech

49

I just glued my eyes at his name while it was appearing on my screen. I didn't answer his call. I couldn't answer his call. I don't want to answer his call then it went off. My heart feels heavy.

Why on earth is he still calling? Will he want to ask about what he saw? Will he ask about my kiss with Aries? Why would he act like he care when he knows he shouldn't act this way?

My phone rings again.

Nick calling...

I answer it.

He exhales. "Where did you go?"

I walked out of the elevator and walked to my dorm. I entered the room and I still didn't answer Nick. He's waiting for my answer too. Tracy wasn't around, I'm sure she's with Clyde. I leaned my back against the door and I feel my heart beating faster.

"Where in hell did you go with Aries, Savannah?" He asked again. He sounds mad at me.

I exhale. "Why do you act like you're concerned about where I went to with Aries? I can go anywhere with any guy I want Nick. I don't need your permission."

I hang up.

My phone rings again.

Damn it Nick!

Nick calling...

I rejected his call but then my phone rings once again just in a split second.

Nick calling...

I answered it. "What do you want from me? I need to sleep Nick!"

"Open your goddamn door Savannah."

My brows creasing.

"Open your fucking door!" He demands while there was a slam on my door that made me flinch.

I exhale. He's outside.

I turned to face the door and took a deep breath in before I opened it. He's here. He's really right outside my room. I hang up on him and he barged his way inside.

"Didn't you leave already?" I asked as my eyebrow arching.

"I came back. I need to talk to you about what I saw." He says.

I looked away. He really saw it. He really saw me kissing Aries. Good. He saw it. I wanted Nick to see it too, cos it'll make me realize if he actually cared or not. If it actually make him jealous or not.

"Where did you go with him?" He asks. Sounded as if he's demanding an answer from me.

My head moves back to Nick and he's looking at me angrily as if I did something really unforgivable. His eyes are piercing into me and he's actually mad. I know he is. It wasn't the same face he had when he saw me with Dustin. His brows are furrowing and his jaw is clenched.

"Answer me." He says.

"I don't have to explain anything to you. You don't have the right to know where I went to with Aries." I defended myself.

I can also fuck any woman I want

"Go. Be free. Fuck a lot of women as much as you want to.

can't do that cos I only want you." He

give

you just admit to yourself that you're fucking jealous?! You get freaking jealous when I'm with another man. You're jealous when you see me with someone else. You get jealous but you don't admit it to yourself!" I

Maybe I am jealous cos you kissed Aries! Now

have the right to know Nick. You and I are not

He laughs humorlessly.

you go fuck?" He

My eyes widened.

ate you?

on his cheek. I slapped Nick. I slapped him hard. My tears are brimming out from my eyes and

kind of woman?! You think I could

looked angry a while ago and now they look soft. He licks his lips and looks confused as

label, but Nick I've never had sex with another

and it's too much already. I always say it's too

for me but I pull myself away from him.

came out. I'm sorry.

out." I say as I

"Savannah please."

fuck out!" I yelled

care if other students were hearing us fight but I wanted him to leave. I'm hurt. I've never imagined he could tell me that. I never imagined he could say that

the doorway. Nick was shocked too. We didn't notice the door opening. We didn't notice that someone came

two..."

humorlessly but I know she

backs? Behind me?! Savannah I thought you

"I'm sorry." I say.

you to stay away from Nick cos he'll only hurt you. But you didn't listen. Now how

I closed my eyes.

that

at least going to court her Nick?" She asked

"No." Nick answers.

quickly. Still no hesitation

I sigh.

same as Aries. You use women. I never thought

are escaping from my eyes like

just

This is

after all those times we were together. God Nick are you really going to keep

It's okay."

hear yourself? He's my brother. You're my roommate. You're a close friend now. I can't let him do this to you! You're an innocent girl. You're too innocent for him. It's like he's treating

her off and my tears are still falling and

lip parted

as much as he wants to and as long as he needs me

at him as if she's asking him that he knows about how I feel and his stares seemed to answer her question. Tracy shakes her head. I feel so low of myself. I tell myself I don't deserve this but I

you for his own pleasure. You should be stopping this.

and cried cos it's

come when he'll get

sigh. "I don't know." I answer

I ruined

You will. You should've known better Nick. She's only eighteen and you're

from getting into a relationship with Clyde and you know I don't like him for you but you still said yes to him. So don't get involve with our shit. It's not your

them to fight because of me. I don't want to hear

sex life, Tracy. It's Savannah's sex life. It's not yours. It's

will always fall first as you see now. You will not only ruin her but you'll

I'm sobbing.

I'm crying.