Too Beautiful for the Alpha

Chapter 21 Chapter 21

Both of the windows in my bedroom are open and the cool air floods in rapidly. Not bothering to keep myself warm, I sit on my bed in my pajamas, waiting for him. The room is dark. The only light is leaking from the bathroom, through the closed door. The Moon creates a glow in my room, all white objects now a hazy blue.

It makes me feel as if I'm dreaming, this glow, these hues. I hold onto my pillow, suffocating it in my arms as my eyes stay fixated on the middle window, the one right across from me. The forest looks like a black, stormy ocean during the night, and he emerges from it like the beast who lurks in its depths. My heart races as I wait for him.

The coldness cleanses me. My toes lose feeling and my lips turn blue, but I feel crisp, I feel fresh. The sounds of footsteps against grass bring my heart to a sudden halt, and I hardly feel a pulse from then on. I slowly stand, feeling my bed against the back of my thighs. He's here.

I close my eyes to calm myself, focusing on my deep breathes, but when I open them, he's in front of me. He stands like a warrior from another time, like a beast, like a man, like something in my dreams. I swallow and stay put, not hurrying to him. "It's freezing in here, Rae," he says, his voice crawling up my legs.

"You lied to me again," I tell him smoothly. "All you do is tell me lies."

James nears me.

"I spoke with Alpha Waters, so what's really going on? What did you lie about this time?"

"Rae, you have to listen to me," he says, reaching for my hands, but I bring them to my chest.

"I can't trust you. You won't let me trust you."

"I can explain."

I peer away from his face, wanting to feel strong again. "Why? Why did you lie about having issues with my pack?"

"I did it to keep you safe—"

I shake my head. "I can't do this anymore. I've given you so many chances, and you just throw them away. I look like an idiot now. I'm the girl who just keeps giving in. I'm pathetic because of you."

"I can explain," he says again.

"So now you'll tell the truth because you got caught? Why couldn't you just give me the truth before? Why is this so hard for you? How do I even know if what you're about to tell me is the truth?"

James looks distressed. "It was my father."

"You can't keep blaming this on your father. You're your own person—"

"No, my father came to my pack." I stay quiet, letting him speak. "A few days after you went home, he showed up out of nowhere. When I came to see you, and you wanted to come back, I couldn't let you because he was still there."

"Your Father is dead, James," I say, knowing that he lied about that too. "So he's not dead?"

James doesn't say anything.

"Why didn't you just tell me your father was back then? Why did you have to lie?"

about him, ever. He is a bad man, Rae. He does not know that you

doesn't know I exist?"

"No," James says strongly.

to have a Mate?

cool skin against his warmth. "No. It's because I don't want him to come near you. It's safest if he believes I

about her?" I ask

"What do you mean?"

eyes. "Were you with

"You would

"How do you—"

days ago I felt

going to fight with him over a lie that kept me safe? Does it bother me that much? It stings a little, but

away. "Alright. If that's what you want,

the next few words to slip from my lips. "It—It wasn't that way," I explain calmly. "He thought our relationship was something more than it was. I didn't know that he was going to kiss me. I pushed

morning. I don't

I'm

like mistake after mistake, but everything behind them has been genuine. I can't say that I know what I'm doing because I don't. I want you to be happy, Rae, that's all I know.

again, knowing that if I keep looking at him, I'll give in to something much more. What can I say? He lied to keep me from his father. He shouldn't have lied, but it wasn't

been trying?" I

brings my eyes to his with his fingers under my chin. "I have. But keeping someone safe and happy at the same time is more difficult than I thought. But I'm

His hand falls.

reject me, but I need a test run. I need

going to take me back

you want, I'll bring

I'm going to promise myself that. I'll go back to his pack to see if everything has been genuine as he says. Her, I'll talk with the hallway ghost as well, I think. Theresa and Gail also. And his Beta, Will. I have a right

I tell him, feeling secure with my sudden

down

"Yes, I'm sure."

I find myself in a trance. Internally, I'm yelling at myself to not give in, so when he draws close, I

"I'm going to need time to get some

James nods.

I also nod. "I'm going to get some things together now.

this time. People know I'm here,"

"No sneaking away?"

gone, I'm not worried about causing suspicion. He's a smart man. He's not

I take a deep breath, "get some sleep. I'll wake you in

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